Monday, 25 July 2011

The Intimacy of Facebook and Men Who Cry in Public on It

Just a quick comment on the day the furniture comes back (the boxes including 5000 books arrive Thursday!): the most emotionally over-the-top posts I've seen on my Facebook network have come from men in the last week or so.

One, who is someone whom I know only because he knows people I know, has been holding forth for the last 10 days about his approaching divorce, how much he misses his kids, how very, VERY unhappy he is. The other, a young man of considerable talent and ambition and whom I have had the pleasure of spending time with, has had some professional reverses lately and was weeping on his page. In his case, it isn't the first time since several months ago when he had a romantic problem, he also unburdened his soul.

Both men received many messages of support from FB friends, far and wide, which I suppose was their aim. If it helped them, terrific. But I can't think of any of my female FB friends who've cried publicly on their pages. Perhaps they have closer, flesh and blood friends to whom they can talk.

Which leads me to some reflection about men and women and their respective emotional networks. Maybe guys find the arms-length "intimacy" of FB easier to handle than actually talking to real people about their problems. And/or maybe this FB semblance of closeness and support is a step in the right direction for men who have always told that it's not manly to show weakness.

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